Improving your personal security abilities and practices not only helps keep you and others safer, it also make you a better friend, parent, and member of your community. Improved personal security gives you greater control and flexibility as you meet life head on. The best example is probably that of using good situational awareness. Yes, it help you identify potential threats and obstacles early, but it also projects confidence and respect towards others.
Use your security skills to be a better friend
I recently walked into a busy shopping center and, as usual, scanned the room. I try to always make myself aware of exits and abnormalities that require more attention. I also use this time to look for anyone I might know. This has turned into a fun game that I like to play (although my wife will often roll her eyes). The object is to see if I can: first, spot anyone I know before they spot me, and second, see how close I can get to them before they notice someone is approaching them – without being sneaky, just walking up.
It is surprising to me how often I can follow someone up and down a couple aisles, or even stand at their elbow in a checkout line, without the person realizing it’s me. Side note, I only do this with people I know well and wouldn’t be upset by it.
However, on this particular recent occasion, I was still entering the facility and noticing a friend when I saw them scan their eyes around the crowd and then spot me coming in the doorway. I don’t recall ever having someone come that close to beating me in my little game before. After exchanging greetings, I explained my game to this friend and my surprise at how quickly they spotted me. Most folks are staring at their phones or so absorbed in what they are doing they have very little awareness of their surroundings. This friend is very extraverted and said “Oh, I was probably just looking for someone to talk to!” But regardless of the reason, it serves the same purpose. This friend is aware of who else is in their vicinity and is paying attention to their surroundings. They would be able to respond quickly, whether it is to a potential threat or by being a good friend and greeting people they know with eye contact and a big smile.
Contrast this now with a situation I observed a couple days later. My wife and I were having lunch at a favorite restaurant of ours. At the table next to ours I saw a lady sitting by herself. She was alternating between scrolling on her phone and looking at the menu, her head bowed down the whole time. I watched as another lady came in the door, walked directly across the restaurant to the first lady and stood at the corner of the table. The first lady didn’t look up or react. The second lady then moved closer, bent down to get into the first lady’s field of vision and called her name. The first lady reacted with a small jump of surprise and then quickly got up to welcome her friend that she apparently was meeting for lunch.
How do you imagine that friend felt to not be noticed or have to invade the other lady’s personal space a bit just to get her presence recognized? Especially since this seemed to be a pre-arranged meeting. The lady who arrived first had no situational awareness at all. She was in what we would call Condition White – completely unaware of her surroundings. Not only does that mean she would be unable to react quickly or well to any problem that occurred in the restaurant, but she also came across as a little rude and unprepared for her friend’s arrival.
Practice to be a better person
It’s been my experience that many people are turned off by the ideal of personal security. They think it is something that only law enforcement or retired members of the military need to worry about or enjoy. But building your repertoire of security best practices can also improve your quality of life and make you a better person in the world. Situational awareness can help you come across as friendly and helpful. A well stocked pantry keeps you ready to donate to a food drive or prepare an extra meal for a neighbor on short notice. Always keeping your car’s gas tank above the halfway line allows you to respond quickly to a short notice car trip – including a hospital run in the middle of the night.
Personal security is not just about trying to stay safe. It’s about getting the most out of life. Being ready for the unexpected. And being a capable, helpful, and friendly member of your community.
More ways to grow
If you’re curious about more ways your personal security journey can help make you a better member of your community, check out these articles:
- Build a first aid and/or trauma kit – and carry it with you.
- Put together an Everyday Carry Kit – great for both preparedness enthusiasts and parents.
- Use your body language to communicate confidence, capability, and friendliness.
- Check out the Everyman Security Archive for more!
